Matthew McConaughey defends the fanny pack


In a recent Fox News report, Matthew McConaughey defends his use of a fanny pack at an Astros-Red Sox game. He told a Fox News reporter, “I’m not afraid of the fanny pack. You gotta kinda put it on the side to make it look a little not as nerdy, but still, practicality wins out. I got so much gear in here that I don’t want in my pockets.”


Our sources were able to locate the fanny pack in question, who stated that despite Mr. McConaughey’s nice words, it in no way reciprocates these feelings, and is actually “mortified” and “embarrassed” to be seen with him in public. The fanny pack further stated that all Mr. McConaughey keeps inside of it are Q-tips and mechanical pencils, which really has no functional use in anyones’ day-to-day life.



Source & image 1 attribution: Matthew McConaughey defends the fanny pack  Published August 18, 2014 New York Post.

Image 2 attribution:
Flickr My Childhood Fanny Packs. No Kidding!” by Michelle Roy.

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