President of a recently established online university, Dr. Blake Adams, told sources that someone is about to graduate and he has absolutely no idea what to do. Although Dr. Adams has graduated numerous times, awarding himself a total of 27 PhD’s,… Read More ›
Bill Thatcher and Margaret Jacobs were recently set up by mutual friends and although they have not yet met, they decided it would be best to attend a couples therapy session for their first date. Mr. Thatcher stated that he… Read More ›
Sources reported that Phillip Barker, a local produce manager, plans to make the largest ever plum display. He stated that it will span aisles 2 through 10 and although the plums are very ripe, he warned all customers against removing… Read More ›
Since receiving her short haircut, actress Ginnifer Goodwin continues to be mistaken for a preadolescent male. Although the film industry is aware that she is not in fact a young boy, the Walt Disney Company continues to offer her… Read More ›
Sources reported that Phil Robertson from A&E’s popular show, Duck Dynasty, recently discovered what appears to be a small child hidden in his overwhelmingly large beard. Experts speculate that this male child is four years of age and was able… Read More ›
Local sources recently reported that Danielle Jacobs, also known as “the lonely depressed woman in her mid-fifties who has a lot of cats and no life,” just ran out of space on the rear windshield of her minivan. Ms…. Read More ›
Sources have just reported that a local man declared his 2015 New Year’s resolution, which is to keep his New Year’s resolution. Image: “Bing.com images“
Thirty-nine year old, Donald Johnson, recently purchased an electronic fitness bracelet to track his daily fitness activities, such as steps taken and calories burned. After just two days of wearing the bracelet Mr. Johnson’s suspicions of leading a completely inactive… Read More ›
When it comes to home infestations, most people assume cockroaches, termites, and spiders, but these only account for 98% of all reported infestations. Following are the 6 least common infestations which account for the remaining 2%: Baby panda infestation… Read More ›
Eleven-year-old Tommy Schmidt was recruited by his neighbors to mow their lawn while they were on vacation. Although Tommy was up to the task, our sources have confirmed that he’s a little confused about the concept of “lawn mowing.” Thus… Read More ›
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