Since receiving her short haircut, actress Ginnifer Goodwin continues to be mistaken for a preadolescent male. Although the film industry is aware that she is not in fact a young boy, the Walt Disney Company continues to offer her… Read More ›
funny
Seahawks’ Super Bowl loss attributed to wrong playbook
Sources reported that the Seattle Seahawks’ loss was attributed to accidentally using the wrong playbook. Apparently, all of the plays called for the Seahawks were directly taken from the playbook created for the Hallmark Hearties from the infamous Kitten Bowl,… Read More ›
Superbowl playing it safe
Due to the recent accusations stating that the Patriots intentionally deflated footballs to gain an advantage, the NFL has intentionally over inflated the footballs that will be used during the 2015 Super Bowl game. Some worry, however, that the… Read More ›
Marathon runner ‘convinced’ he is being followed
Long time marathon runner, James Hunt, told sources that he is “constantly being followed” and that he is “becoming more and more scared for his life.” A spokesman for the police department stated that they are taking Mr…. Read More ›
Small child reportedly found in Duck Dynasty’s beard
Sources reported that Phil Robertson from A&E’s popular show, Duck Dynasty, recently discovered what appears to be a small child hidden in his overwhelmingly large beard. Experts speculate that this male child is four years of age and was able… Read More ›
Crazy cat lady runs out of sticker space on minivan
Local sources recently reported that Danielle Jacobs, also known as “the lonely depressed woman in her mid-fifties who has a lot of cats and no life,” just ran out of space on the rear windshield of her minivan. Ms…. Read More ›
Local man declares New Year’s resolution
Sources have just reported that a local man declared his 2015 New Year’s resolution, which is to keep his New Year’s resolution. Image: “Bing.com images“
Ice cream man admits the unthinkable
Sources reported that a local ice cream man recently divulged disturbing news to nine-year-old Trent Wilson. Apparently, he told Trent that each of the six colors of his favorite Fruity Pops all taste the same. Trent later told sources that his world pretty… Read More ›
Study shows that polar bears do not actually prefer Coca-Cola products
Contrary to Coca-Cola’s popular commercials, a recent study demonstrated that polar bears actually prefer fresh blood from a recent kill to a bottle of Coke. After presenting the polar bears with either an injured seal or a refreshing bottle of… Read More ›
ISIS apologizes to US, pushes for 17.5th Peace Amendment
Due to the recent US airstrikes against the Islamic State of Iraq and Al Sham (ISIS), terrorist leader, Abu al-Baghdadi, recently apologized to the United States with an official apology letter and a fruitcake. Although Obama has yet to speak about this apology,… Read More ›