Prince Al-Waleed recently donated 10,000 barrels of oil to homeless and underprivileged families. The Prince stated that each family can do whatever they please with their barrel, but after they are done doing whatever it is they plan on… Read More ›
Sources reported that Phillip Barker, a local produce manager, plans to make the largest ever plum display. He stated that it will span aisles 2 through 10 and although the plums are very ripe, he warned all customers against removing… Read More ›
Local sources reported that Pope Francis has once again locked himself out of the Vatican. The Pope was overheard saying that he “seriously has no idea what happened to them.” Although he usually keeps a spare key under the flower pot… Read More ›
It was recently reported that reserve deputy Robert Bates accidentally shot an unarmed black man in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Apparently, he meant to grab his taser, but instead grabbed his gun. Given the numerous police shootings of unarmed black men in… Read More ›
Vote for your favorite Easter Bunny and win a chance to get a middle of the night Easter Bunny visit while you are sleeping. Or when you are home alone taking a shower. Or both. 1 2 3 4 5… Read More ›
Sources reported that two girls displayed a “pretty pathetic” attempt at coordinating their gym attire. Sarah Adams and Monique Jimenez planned to look “super cute together,” but according to gym patrons, they “failed miserably.” Sarah stated that she was going… Read More ›
Sources reported that Bob Thomas, a local community leader, is still speaking about public matters. He has been speaking for about seven hours now and the audience is confused as to whether or not the speech will end. Audience members… Read More ›
Local sources reported that Jim Anderson, 46, recently dined at La Cantina and was looking forward to ordering the Colossal Nacho Plate. He stated, however, that the waitress was “way too hot” for her to see him “shoving $18 worth of nachos down… Read More ›
Sources reported that the Easter Bunny was recently arrested at a local bar and is currently incarcerated, which will likely lead to the cancellation of Easter Sunday. Bar patrons stated that the Easter Bunny was drinking excessively, picking random fights, and telling… Read More ›
Recent research shows that no matter how far you punt a small dog, it will immediately return to you and continue to be annoying. The researchers plan to continue this line of research by investigating whether or not the dog… Read More ›
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